My poker buddy and International Man of Mystery, “Afghan Dan” ( real name withheld ), arrived back from his “contract” in Kabul,Afghanistan, last week. Dan is a shady character who moves best at night and whilst the poker crew know what Afghan Dan does up there in that war torn region none of us choose to discuss it out of respect for his secre….er..privacy. Hell, all the poker players are involved in dubious activities of some sort- from flying the Royal family around ( Luke ), satellite mapping ( Paul ), controlling the nation’s water supply ( Jeff ) and Championing bad haircuts ( Chris ).
At any rate, during a skype conversation the other month to see how Afghan Dan’s guerill…er..”contract”….was going, I asked him if there was any chance he could bring back an AK47 for me. He didn’t hold out much hope so I asked if instead he could bring back another W.O.M.D, a traditional sheesha pipe. You know….hubbly bubbly, hookah. To my surprise Afghan Dan said “no problems” and so last night I bowled over to his bunker and picked up my new toy, along with all tools required and two tubs of Dubai Tobacco’s finest apple and mint puff. Dan even threw in a Kabul Golf Club hat and shirt – may Allah bless him.
After a dinner of roast duck and Chinese style pork, and with a bottle of Chilean red on the table, it was time to lock and load this puppy and Leakhana and Veasna watched in awe as I assembled the beautiful, camel adorned W.O.M.D with all the skill of a raghead moozie fundamentalist fatwah declaring terrorist insurgent putting together a car bomb. Although there were no instructions, I had a fair idea of what to do from years of training with smaller bong…er…..W.O.M.Ds so the coals were soon blazing and the sweet sweet aroma of apple sheesha filled the living room. Even the wife had a few long draws on the pipe which just made her plain silly.
The hilarious thing is Afghan Dan’s container arrives soon with pipes for several other members of the poker crew so on the last Saturday of every month I envision sheesha’s galore and with Teemu and his resin connection, things could get real messy !